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God has been blessing me and my family even when I didn’t want to believe it. A few months ago I had decided to call off my child support battle with my ex and go home with my child and try to rebuild our lives. Well my ex decided to fight me and filed an injunction to prevent me from leaving the state. He had not seen our son for 8 months prior to this injunction but felt it was necessary to seek joint then sole custody of our child. Before I found out about the injunction I had been on the phone with a friend who was telling me to give all my worries and everything in between to God and at the time my faith was in shambles but I agreed. I talked to God and gave him my all and I went to sleep. I woke up hours later to a voicemail from my ex fiancé’s attorney with info about the injunction. I didn’t have an attorney. I couldn’t afford one as I had no income because I was a stay at home mom and had given up everything prior to be with my ex. I called my friend crying because I was mad at God for doing this to me. I blamed God because I thought that if I gave my worries to him that I was well on my way to being ok but that wasn’t the case or so I thought. My friend told me to trust God and that it maybe ok to leave my son with his dad. I couldn’t agree with that and I hung up the phone in such turmoil. I prayed a little but it was an angry helpless prayer and there was no faith in it at all. The next day I made a few phone calls to see if I could get any legal help and was turned away. I asked if I could speak with the judge in hopes that I could come up with some sort of agreement and that failed. I was given the number to 3 attorneys from the bar association. I zeroed in on number 2. At the time I didn’t know why but it was all God pointing me to her. I called and gave her my info. My court date was on 2/27/15. She said she couldn’t go to court that day and even if she could she would need a retainer of 1200 and a hourly rate of 350. I couldn’t give her a dime so I thanked her and began to hang up but she stopped me and said to come in the next day with a of my paperwork and she would see if she could offer me some advice. I was reluctent but I agreed. I didn’t want to get my hopes up and I was scared. The next day I while waiting in her office I texted me friend. I told him that I was waiting and scared. His response was “take a deep breath god has a miracle for you” I said ok took a deep breath said a prayer and then she called me in. She looked over my paperwork said she would help me and that she would work out a payment plan!!!!! I cried and thanked her and we made arrangements to meet at the courthouse the next day! I thought that was my answered prayer but God was not done. The next day at the courthouse she agreed to take my case pro bono!!! Praise God. She went to battle for me and the injunction was temporarily lifted and I was able to leave with my family back to our hometown. The war with my ex isn’t over and there’s still so much to be done but God laid a foundation for me to witness all that he is capable of doing. I still struggle with my faith and trusting what I can not see but he has been blessing and comforting me all this time. I believe him to continue doing the impossible because with God the impossible is possible
I Praise God for Life! Jesus is truly alive and well. I was only18 years old full of fear, shame from the taboo of generational incest, and family violence when I woke up one evening to find half of my face blown completely away! On September 6, 1974, my then husband and children’s father followed me in a high-speed chase one day after work and put a twelve gauge shotgun between my eyes at close range and blew away the entire right side of my face. I AM A MIRACLE to be alive to tell the story!Today over 38 years later, I am a living testimony of God’s Miracles, Mercy & Grace to the lost and hurting, – especially battered and abused, women, men, and children. With great convictions, I work diligently to build better families and relationships. It is God’s desire that we all walk in love, peace, and unity; and that relationships and families be healthy and whole. I praise God for His mercy and grace to use me for such times as these when so much violence, murder, and mental illness has overtaken even the very elect.
Once there was a little boy. He was precocious, intelligent, & sensitive. He had two parents, two siblings, lived in a nice house near the Catskills in New York State. It seems a common enough life. And then the father decided it wasn’t good enough. He wanted more…so he had an affair at work, and left his wife and kids…the boy was devastated. Was it my fault, don’t you love me, why are you leaving. We moved to a city upstate, and that’s when it got even worse. Mom drank, we were poor, I was confused, anxious, and at the time undiagnosed with adhd. I remember being sent to the school counselor, I had done something irregular. We played chess. In grade school I was playing well, I guess, as we must have played more than once for me to remember it. I was also in a special reading program. I didn’t realize until sometime as an adult, that it was an advanced reading program. I had thought for years it had been remedial, when in fact as the IQ tests showed back then, I was very smart. Well school was ok, then. I grew up, all too quickly. After being molested at a ‘friend’ of my mother’s house at 8 I was more confused, and by 7th grade started with sex and drugs…I was not able to stand up for myself, and was different enough that I was not a pack leader by a long shot. ‘Friends’ were hard to come by and faithful people at that point didn’t exist in my world. Can you imagine trying to reconcile life at that age; the middle kid with that history…? Alcoholism was taking its toll. I left.
I moved to my dads and started over…unfortunately his addictive tendency was in full force and fueled mine and the porn was found; another escape, another dead end. I made it through high school fairly unscathed, but my need for love was unfulfilled. I was asked to leave mid year of 12th grade, leaving my friends and moving back to my moms. I found out later my dad had molested my sister, and a cousin…his marriage ended soon after I left and he left our lives in 1986, and hasn’t been seen or heard from since.
At just about the end of high school I moved back to moms. She had by this time gotten some help, and was going to church (she had been going to an Episcopal church all the while) but was now saved, and she got married…I left soon after. I remember only having one distinct conversation with my dad while I lived with him about ‘belief in god’. I had my belief (or lack of belief) and church had nothing to do with it. He used to drop us kids off at the Episcopal Church in town, while he and his wife went to the Roman church. I have very few memories of actually going while I lived with him, a few as a younger kid with brother and sister, being welcomed into the Episcopal Church in town, by people who it seemed must have really pitied us.
So as a young man now, I had no relationship with god that I know of… drugs, sex, and somehow paying the bills, this was life; getting ripped off by a roommate left me bitter. I had a girlfriend at the time; thank God I didn’t get her pregnant.
Well, as are God’s mysterious ways, people had been praying for me. I was struck by the incongruity of this idea of God, and this empty world I lived in. So having a thought in my head for a while about god, I somehow made it into a church on a Sunday morning. This larger than life, Episcopal priest saw me that morning, and had no idea what God was going to do for me that day. As you have I’m sure heard before, it was as if God knew I was going to be there and that priest (God actually) talked directly to me for over a half hour in the sermon, and I was stunned. Wow, that was cool I thought. But people were praying for me…do you get it? I was moving inexorably toward a destiny I didn’t know existed. It was all over but the shouting, sobbing, swearing, kicking and screaming. A resentful, bitter, hurt, needy, angry, lonely, mistreated, and abused, boy saw his heavenly Fathers love for the first time and rejoiced!
I got saved and God started cleaning me up. I was on fire for God! I was filled with His Holy Spirit soon after, and received the gift of tongues, and several other gifts of the Holy Spirit. These included some gifts of healing, of faith, of worship, interpretation of tongues, prophesy, words of knowledge words of wisdom, and discerning of spirits. I attended both the Roman Church’s charismatic mass & the Episcopal Church weekly. I got loved on by many people, including the recovering alcoholic deacon at my church. He prayed and counseled with me many times, as did the priest.
One night I made mention I might be going to college to him and he announced almost immediately during one of the fellowship meals we had in those days, that I WAS going back to school, and could we all come and pray for me right then! I did the 5 year plan, and got an AA and a BA; and the BA was a dual major in Biology & Psychology. So just before graduating I did like many of us did, I fell in love, and got married. But this too did not free me from my childhood wounds; & as I failed to love my wife as Christ loves the church we were divorced after 23 years. We had separated several times and I did not want it to end. After having to leave my home, my wife & my kids, I had always made the effort to figure out what God wanted, but could not make it work – so I finally had to ask her to leave & she did. Of course this didn’t happen in a one sided vacuum, but I include this to say that God is not finished with me yet. In fact, I have renewed my vows to Him & he has accepted me.
All through this timeI have been asking God to heal me. I have been asking God to use me. I have been asking God what He wants from me, and how to do what He wants me to do. I joined a Christ centered recovery meeting, and am now in leadership. I joined a street evangelism group, followed Christ in any way the Lord might lead, including preaching the kingdom, healing the sick, praying for deliverance and the setting of those oppressed and addicted in need of deliverance free in Jesus name. I write and I pray, and I sing & worship. I witness His saving love and grace and mercy almost every day. And I want more. I want to use my gifts. I want to be an expression of Gods love and truth to a dying and depraved generation, and world. And you know what God said about this? He said yes, go! But he also said for me to take the time to get healed, and this is happening.
I feel a man at peace with himself, with God, and with those around him, is a powerful force for the kingdom of God. I feel in my heart of hearts, a deep compassion for people. I am aware of my eagerness to press on where angels fear to tread, and I am under spiritual advisement and authority. I am not a lone ranger; I am not an island unto myself. I am a Man, capable, loving, caring, intelligent, still somewhat precocious, and still sensitive to this day. Gods Spirit is moving…do you feel it, do you want to? Let’s Pray!
Holy God may your compassion be a light to those wounded in the struggles of this life. May we as your bride to be, serve each other selflessly, seeking out the lost lambs of your kingdom. And Lord, as we cannot hope to do any of this without your Holy Spirit, please teach us to number our days by seeking you daily and praying for the grace to do your will in all that we undertake, In the precious name of Jesus, Amen!
” I will never leave you or forsake you” Hebrews 13:5
I was married to a physically and mentally abusive man. His drug addiction only fueled his rage. I lived in fear, annimosity, bitterness, hopelessness, depression, no self-esteem, and rage myself.
He isolated me from my family, friends and the rest of the world. He controlled every move I made until I literally felt like I was living in a box…my own prison.
I lost sight of who I was and who I was ever going to be. I spent all of my time trying to love him. All of my prayers were praying for him and our marriage. Daily I continued to listen to christian radio, read the Bible, and prayed. Even when I thought I wasn’t absorbing anything, I know now that I had been all along.
I deteriorated little by little. I began having suicidal thoughts..unlike I ever had before. I began going through all of the possibilities and deciding which I would have the courage to complete. I wrecked my car going 118 mph on I-10. Jesus had the wheel that day. My car completed two 360s and on the third my car rolled backwards up the ramp to hwy 45. My car was damaged on every side. I walked away with two burns on my chest from the airbag and my seatbelt. This woke me up.
The last time I allowed him to hurt me was the last. I was desparate to find myself again, know God again, and fulfill my purpose. I realized I was living in bondage and my ex was keeping me from the very thing God wanted me to have…LIFE!
When I left and decided that I was going to divorce him I asked God, “What do you want me to learn from this?” He has shown me a lot. I have learned a lot.
Today I am ME. I rediscovered myself and I am becoming the woman God made me to be. I have discovered God on a level unlike I have ever known. It is beautiful and wonderful. I am 100% happy with all that I have and all that I am. I am His voice and His messenger. My life is His and my testimony is His. He rescued me, I owe Him everything in me and of me.
God can make the best of the worst of situations. There is nothing impossible for Him. He is always there…ALWAYS. Trusting and having faith in Him is the greatest survival tip for any situation. It is what rescued me. Even in the midst of the craziest moment with my ex I would close my eyes and pray. It is amazing what will happen when you trust your life to Him. It was the best decision I have EVER made.
I have many great things that God has done for me that I would love to share. But one in particular really proved God was looking out for me big time.
I was married and my relationship was emotionally and physically abusive. Being an immigrant, I had no papers to work legally so I had to take what ever jobs I could get under the table. At that time I worked as a housekeeper, taking home only $530/mth.Yet still I had to travel, buy groceries for my husband and I, pay the phone bill and still be faithful with my tithes. Somehow, although my husband had two jobs, he was always broke and I always had money extra to help him with the car expenses and in paying the rent. He was not paying his tithes!
Within six months of marriage I was diagnosed with depression and had to be put on antidepressants for 6 months. During this time my husband was having an affair with an old girlfriend in his home country and traveled there sometimes twice a year leaving the rent unpaid, coming back with pictures and videos of him and the girl together.
I had stage 3 stress. I developed chronic fatigue syndrome where if I sat for more than 5 minutes I would fall asleep. I use to get up every hour, staring at the clock, not being able to remember what day of the week it was or when I was supposed to get up or what I was supposed to do when I got up in the morning. Things got so bad that I was scared to go to bed, for the feeling of not knowing what to do terrified me greatly! I developed fibromyalgia. Every muscle on me pained. My weight went from 127 lbs to 101 lbs in less than a month. Even a size zero was too big for my waist. Instead of trying to help me get better, my husband shunned me, making light my weight loss. People at church kept on telling me to eat and put some meat on my bones, but no one knew how sick I was. My hair began falling out in clumps so I began wearing wigs and I became allergic to all forms of sugar. For 6 months I ate nothing but salads, vegetables and chicken trying to find out what foods made me sick. I had to pay to keep seeing doctor after doctor…and no one knew why I was losing weight so dramatically or why I was constantly feeling ill.
All this time all I did was kneel before God and cry and pray, begging Him to save my marriage and change me. I thought that if I changed and became a better wife, my husband would love me and treat me better. I stopped asking him to show me love, and begged that he would at least just be kind to me!….I was praying constantly…but where was God?
My husband didn’t think that him having his girlfriend was wrong. He said he never did love me and that him not being with his ex was my fault. All this time he kept on telling his family stories about me so they would agree that he should leave and go to his aunt’s to live. Even as the choking and slapping continued, I kept my family on the outside. I would only call my mother and cry, not saying why and then hang up. I had such bad anxiety attacks that if I had to speak to anyone, I would start gasping for air.
I wanted my marriage to be saved! I didn’t want my family hating him in case he changed and things got better.
Physically, I felt like my spirit was slowly leaving my body! I gave up all my friends when I got married for he was always insecure about who I was talking to. For two years the abuse and infidelity continued and still he refused to go for counseling. The pastors never approached him. They all saw him as being special and that he was not capable of doing what I was accusing him of. Everyone in church knew him for he was funny and very talented. No one cared about what was happening to me….not even the pastor! Still, I went to church, did my ministries, put on a happy face and pretended that all was well in my world.
Then, his mother sent him a ticket to come back home on a vacation…without me. Deep in my soul I knew that if he left, our marriage would be over. I went as far as to hide his passport. I begged him to please don’t go even as he was walking out the door for the airport.
He went on his trip and for a whole week, he never called to say he had arrived. Even his mother made excuses for him, saying he was tired from the flight…a week later! His family here already told her everything so she was also trying to give him a way out. And it worked….
Instead of coming home in two weeks, he called and said that he was staying longer, not sure how long. Then after the next two weeks had passed, he said he wanted a divorce and that he wasn’t coming back home to me.
Right then my soul died!
I gave everything up in my life to be his wife. I would do housekeeping all day so much that I couldn’t walk, yet did the groceries on my home and still made dinner before he got there. I didn’t do anything or go anywhere without letting him know where I was.
My marriage was over and I was scared!
I had no papers, no real job to support myself…How was I going to live without him? He wasn’t a good husband but to me it was better than having no husband!
I couldn’t even think of two things that I liked about myself…To me if he didn’t want me it was because I was not worth anything. Who would love me if he didn’t?
I finally told my sister what was happening to me and she cried!
The great thing is that I never got angry at God! I wish I understood why he allowed it…why I had to feel such tearing in my soul….There I was at the end of the month with husband and no rent.
Two days later I got a call from the client I did housekeeping for and she asked if I would look after her elderly in-laws and clean their home for two weeks. She was paying me $125 a day!….for two weeks.
Being at that home saved my life!
Instead of focusing on me and my problems and what I needed, I had to think of this couple, married for 60 years with the wife frail and the husband….he had prostate cancer.
At night I would cry and pray and God gave me Isaiah 54 as His promise to me. Read it sometime!
While cleaning the bookshelf, I came across a book and I began browsing through it. The most profound phrase in that book said that ‘I could choose to be happy, that my life was my choosing! That was it! That was what I needed to know for myself, that I had a choice. I called my husband and I told him that I chose to be happy for me first. He was shocked by my words for I was only calling him and begging him to reconsider. I didn’t think I had a choice before, that I had to stay and endure my abuse and ill-treatment because I was a Christian, and because God hates divorce.
At the end of the two weeks, I got asked to stay for another two weeks. I went from no rent, which was by the way only $200/ month, to receiving more than what my husband made in two months. After that month, my client decided to go ahead and have double hip replacement surgery and asked if I would move in and help her with the kids paying me $100 a day. I packed up my things from the one room which was my clothes and my books and I moved in for 3 months.
God gave me more money than I would have ever earned even if I had a real job. I was able then to buy my computer cash, pay first and last on an apartment, paying for all my medical bills, take night classes and got a cell phone, plus secure another job and still paid my tithes! Although I had no papers, I was never without a job. God took care of every need I had. When I did my taxes each year, they kept on enquiring how I was able give more to the church in tithes and offering than I made that year. I told her honestly, only God knows! To the faithful God shows himself faithful!
People may say this is crazy but God took my marriage away. Not to be mean but because he loved me too much to see me suffer any longer. I wasn’t going to leave but I was also dying. At the end of it all, my pastor said that I had to go back……Imagine the horror I felt hearing those words! Even Christian friends told me to go back. I prayed and I told God how I felt. I told him that it would be like being sentenced to life in a rat infested dungeon, chained by my ankles and waist. But if it was his will, I would obey and reconcile. I asked my husband if he wanted to and he said no. Those were the best words he ever spoke to me! My hands were now clean! The marriage ending would now be upon him for I did my part, and God had set me free.
It took over 7 years for my body to finally recover from all the abuse and trauma. I had to forgive and I had to learn also how to let it go and keep moving forward with my life, knowing that my Father is always looking out for me.
Since then, my in-laws apologized for the way they treated me and realized that he was the one that was wrong all along. The shame that would have been mine, fell upon him. The bible says that they that put their trust in Lord will not be put to shame! Members of his family that never spoke to me, encouraged me to move on with my life and forget about him.
Whenever I feel the urge to complain or wonder can God?…..I remember those days on my knees desperate for help, and although it didn’t come the way I was expecting it, it came right on time and saved and changed my life. If God does nothing else for me, I will still not have enough time through eternity to say ‘thank you, for saving my life’.
No matter what you’re going through today, how long you’ve been in your painful trials or how far gone you think your situation is- God is able and He will come when you call upon His name. Is there anything to difficult for my God to do? – I’m healed today…I’m whole today and I’m profoundly blessed…..the answer is NO! Trust in the Lord with all your heart, and lean not on your own understanding but in all your ways, acknowledge Him, and He will surely (I can testify to it) direct your path! Proverbs 3:5, 6.
Don’t worry….Father Knows!
I was in a marriage that was so unloving and I was told to go to Al Anon. It helped me find a way to stay in the marriage and things are better and I have found love in my marriage.
God works in mysterious ways 🙂
There is nothing that compares to His love and grace. As I came to Houston for a relationship, I found true love that has been so awesome and nothing compares! God’s love has continued to fill me and never leave me empty! From the beginning, my life after being baptized has all been led through the grace of God and by the power of the Holy Spirit.
A few years back I felt an inner voice telling me to help the helpless in a time where I was helpless. My heart was broken and had nothing but, the car that got me here. I was just ready to go home and be comforted by all that I knew, all that I was. Without a job, without my friends and family, newly stepping out of a relationship that led me here, without a desire to stay in Houston, when my home was in California, and without the confidence and resources to do His work. All this and still trying to understand God’s perfect will for my life as a new Christian 🙂
I had just been baptized on April 8th 2006 and 2 months later I started a ministry feeding the homeless. Nothing had ever felt so right in my life! Nothing really made sense at first and of course I had no idea what I was doing as well but, God led and I followed. Where I was weak He made me strong! I didn’t know how but, I knew my heart and what it was telling me. I needed to help others when I needed help myself. I had to step out in faith.
Without any money in my account I wrote a check in faith for the supplies to fill bags with lunch and write encouragement and scriptures to bring a smile. I went to my friend’s house with supplies and we began making 50 peanut butter & jelly sandwiches with snacks, fruit drinks, fruit, and water all contained in one little brown bag. I didn’t even know where I was going to go with them since I had recently become a Houston resident. I was always lost in this big city. But we stepped into my little car and took off for downtown.
We stopped for every homeless person we saw. Some of them needed prayer; some of them needed food to eat. Whether we were nourishing their soul or their body we were just excited to be able to supply those that are so truly in need. After our first trip out we arrived back at church to share the experience and an amazing man of God connected me to a great ministry that needed sandwiches distributed. We were supplied Antone’s sandwiches from the Children’s Activity Center and I would make soup as well on the cold days. A huge pot that barely fit my trunk was enough to feed at least 30. God provided for so many and especially for me. A job came into my life immediately after listening to my heart and there was not even a fee that was charged on my checking account for insufficient funds! Nothing could explain it and I just knew God’s provision and love in a new way.
Some thousands of sandwiches later we had both reached our goal to feed the homeless and bring others to the Lord as well. And just inspire and encourage those that just need a warm smile on a cold day. We had gone out every weekend rain, sleet or snow 😉 There were only a few of us that went out and the Lord used us, our small group to change the lives of many. So many testimonies, so many lives forever changed. God has brought those in need to salvation, healed the sick, delivered those in substance abuse and even prostitution. We have been witnesses of His signs, wonders, and miracles. All for the glory of God’s goodness! Not only did God answer my prayer to help me in my unfortunate circumstances but, He did better and used ordinary me to do extraordinary things for his children!
Remember “He doesn’t call the qualified, He qualifies the called!”- Author Unknown
All things are possible through Him! Never let your circumstances make you but, be renewed to the leading of God’s will over your life. Greater is He that is in you than he that is in this world! I pray this encourages you to step out in what He is calling you to do. His grace is sufficient and His love conquers all!
My husband & I went through tough times in our first 8 years together, mostly financial hardships, which caused frequent arguments. I realized that those were the years that we didn’t have Jesus in our lives. We worked 3 jobs each just to make both ends meet. We were desperate and miserable. I was raised Catholic and have always believed in Jesus, but as I got older and got distracted with responsibilities of life, I had no time for God. I started to doubt God and so did my husband (who was also raised by a very Christian family). But I guess because of that little faith still left in me, Jesus knocked several times on our doors, that we ignored each time. For the next few years, He kept knocking, until one day, I just found myself accepting Him as my Savior. Things turned around, of course, for the better. The inner peace that is indescribable is just there in my heart. It took a while for my husband to get back on track, but because of my renewed faith, God won over the devil once again. Life is not without a struggle, but with our strong faith and because of God’s grace, we jump these hurdles with no sweat. Even with today’s economy, especially being involved in the real estate business, when our competitors are one by one closing their doors, we’re still here… and strong. Strong, not because we’re good, but because God is with us, guiding us every step of the way. Every morning I pray, I ask God for wisdom, to make the decisions for us, be it business or personal. I know that every decision we make are His decisions, so there’s nothing to worry about…ever!
John 8:10-11 – When Jesus raised Himself up, He said to her, “Woman, where are your accusers? Has no man condemned you?”
She answered, “No one, Lord!” And Jesus said, “I do not condemn you either. Go on your way and from now on sin no more.”
Hmmm? Where would I begin? That thought could go on and on? Grace!? Grace!? and MERCY!? Jesus is awesome! Do you know of the story in the Bible, in the book of John, chapter 8? It speaks of the adulterous woman that the religious scholars and Pharisees led into the temple while Jesus was teaching. This woman was caught in the act of adultery and the evil men were trying to stone her while at the same time incriminate Jesus. Well, to make the story short, Jesus told the accusers that if they were without sin to throw the first stone at her. Obviously they were all sinners and they ended up just leaving. Jesus ended up pardoning her.
What’s my point? That could have been the story of my life. And the best part of the story is that Jesus forgives. And when He forgives, He forgets and we are made new. I thank God a gazillion times for Jesus. I beg you, if you are reading this testimony and if you have had an affair or know of someone who has, please recount them this parable and make it known that Jesus does forgive and He makes all things new! I love you and I thank you for not judging. I am praying for YOU!! For with God ALL things are possible, Luke 1:37
I grew up in a Christian home. I was a rebellious child and did not follow the way of my folks. I went my own way. My own way led me down a dark road of sin. I was full of pride, greed, selfishness, and deceit until one day I was faced with the consequences of my sin.
I lay in bed, alone in a cheap hotel room, recovering from one of my worst moments in life. (We’ve all had them) I had seen the pain that my prideful selfish deceitful lifestyle had caused. I saw it up close and personal. I had almost been run over by someone I had wronged, my mind was spinning. As I lay there, I was remembering her fits of rage and tears – What a wretched man I had become. I don’t think I had ever hated myself more than at that moment. I remember thinking about how arrogant and prideful I was, how I thought I was somebody, until it all came to a climax. I was now a broken man.
It was at that moment, my moment of weakness, pain and humility; that I heard God’s call. It was not an audible voice, but rather a strong desire or a compelling thought. I remember it as clear as day. It was a sudden realization that – God is real! My next thought, soon after, was, “If He’s real – Oh No! What miserable person I am.” A real sinner in the truest sense, I think I had broken just about every command, except one. I knew the way I was living was not right. My heart had been so cold – stone cold. I finally saw the truth about myself and my sinful condition. I was 34 and what did I have to show for my life, nothing but a legacy of lies and deceit. I had lived it exclusively for my pleasure and myself; I had pushed away any meaningful relationship that I had. I began to cry then, I felt God’s call. I remembered what I had learned back in Sunday school and what I had read in the Bible years before. I remembered the God of my parents; the same God I had rejected and was so angry and bitter at. I got down on my knees and begged God for His mercy, I asked Him to come into my life. The only thing I really knew at that point was that I was a miserable failure at managing me and I needed Him to show me the way. I asked Jesus to be my Lord and to save me from myself and sin.
God showed up. I immediately felt His presence. With tears in my eyes I received the Lord Jesus as my savior. One of my favorite scriptures perfectly describes what took place in my life; it’s Ezekiel 36:26, 27: “I will give you a new heart and put a new spirit in you; I will remove from you your heart of stone and give you a heart of flesh. And I will put my Spirit in you and move you to follow my decrees and be careful to keep my laws.”
God did exactly that, He gave me His Spirit. I was no longer the same. My cold heart of stone was beating again. His Spirit gave me life and I wanted to follow His commands. I had used alcohol, drugs, and a very promiscuous lifestyle to numb my soul from my pain, now I have the peace of God that can’t even begin to understand. I became utterly devoted to Jesus Christ. He saved my life, He took all my sorrows and pain, He healed the many wounds I had from the past, and He became my best friend. It is because of His love and redemption that I am being changed day by day. The greatest testimony is that of the ones closest to me, the people who know me so well: my family has seen my life and attitude transform, my wife sees me growing closer to God and how I treat others, and even my co-workers have seen my growth and Christian walk. I am so thankful everyday for God who is working in me saving me from my old self everyday.
And even though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death…I know my God, is with me at all times…
For the past month or so I have been feeling distant from God…but at the same time I know He hasn’t left me.
I have finally found the root of why I have been feeling this way, and it had to do with the fact that I let someone that was not supposed to be in my life back in. This person was a hindrance in my walk with God…and this person almost devoured me whole…BUT the ANGEL of MERCY came to my rescue and I have finally gotten my PASSION back for JESUS…
If you are feeling distant or disconnected from God, I challenge YOU to take inventory of what is or who is in your life right now and line them or it up against the Word of God, and if they are taking you away from GOD, then I beg you to pray and ask God for direction on that relationship…….xoxo…seek first the kingdom of God and all these things shall be added unto you….Peace Be Upon You!!